Week 18 – Someone to listen

How good it is to have someone to listen to us when we need it. But are we listening to other people, or are we just trying to be heard? And when we listen, how are we acting? I like to talk, and everyone that knows me says that I talk a lot. This has been the way since my childhood. I remember my teacher asking me to be quiet at school in order to not disturb my classmates. Before, I used to anticipate what other people were going to tell me, and make my deductions and judgements even before someone had finished telling me what was happening to them. It was only when I started studying counselling skills, that I discovered that it is more interesting and important to listen than talk.

In this course, I learned that many people seeking counselling just want to be heard. They don’t want to be judged, they just want to learn more about their feelings and how they can deal with them. However, the majority of people, including myself, want to solve their problem straight away when they come to speak to us, giving them our opinions and suggestions quickly. Our judgments speak louder than they do, our own convictions arise, and we end up not helping them because we could not offer what they really needed, our ears to listen. What kind of a listener are you? One who hears and already has the solution ready to people’s problems? Or the one that helps people to discover themselves and find their right path? The next time someone comes to tell you something, watch how you react towards their situation. Try to listen more and talk less, and you will realise that you can learn more about that person by just listening to them

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